You heard that right, loo-tenant. Who put this limey in charge of this mission? He can't even pronounce half of da places in the goddamn game so go get me a soda, whilst I chow down a salami sarnie with SIO cable to go...
A trailer for a review? Baz, you are now addicted to the camera, is Bev doing your hair and make up yet? Good thing there's no screen reflection, probably sat there naked! And remember, it all starts off by playing a kids game!! Awaiting review, never got on with this game so will be fun to see someone actually play it.. Makes me want to play Trains, just for the nice music... And a fine game too..
Moving on, Baz kickstarts his video jukebox (what track will he have gone with to tie in with the software?) and gets the game underway so check out the initial stages of... AGENT U S A
Paul's wanting to see what the hell Baz actually looks like when he's doing these games (and Bev's got him out of her underwear etc), so for fans of Baz's weekend arcade and video game reviews here we are - Baz in his full "glory" and of course Evil Edna got a name check in his game review as perhaps being the UK 80s version of Agent USA's fuzzbomb:
As they say upt Norf, a reet good lookin bastard.. Only Northern people can be complementary and rude in the same sentence..
OK, review lurvers, we last left Baz in his cave on his XL.... getting on board a train from St Louis to Louisville while Last Train to Clarksville played in the background. Is there any reason for this, you ask? Is there a method to his micro madness? Has he removed the skimpy underwear yet and/or the cornflake mask? No data is available or explanation(s) forthcoming from him at this stage. He has posted up this image telling us that he has been "out the zone" but we think that most good shrinks would have arrived at this conclusion already: He was last heard muttering "Go fix me a Screwdriver" to no-one in particular. You know it yourself, you just can't get the staff these days...
Good heavens... according to locals, Baz's train arriving on platforms 3,4 & 5 in Louisville, has come in sideways. Whatever next as he nips off to Nashville for some good ol' country and western (or is he just out to make a c*nt tree and western of his mission??) Enough of this nonsense - let's catch up with the next episode of our insane yet intrepid explorer's Atari adventure into the realms of Fuzzbombs and micro madness:
Eeh, the marvels of Memphis - anyone spot Elvis leaving the building or was that Baz in one of those nice tightly strapped suits heading for the institution? He certainly won't be gracing Graceland at this rate. Join Baz on his next episode as he aims to deliver a killer payload of cure-all crystals to the US version of Evil Edna... and so settle the hash of the FUZZBOMB...
Yes, Baz - give us a break from your brand of "entertainment" and put the marvellous Monkees on to keep your audience of that old bloke in the flasher mac and his three-legged Jack Russell even moderately interested, fella, and please post us a link to somewhere where we can learn a bit more about this title p-p-please... http://www.pixelatedarcade.com/games/agent-usa
Will get around to having a watch asap, my daughter and I seem to have developed a vomit bug which has been driving us insane, bit annoying for her as she's back at Uni and trying to finish her unit. Things not made better by a 3 day long 'bonkathon' by the flat above that starts when they get in from a club at 2am. I suggested she go up to the door of the flat during a 'sesh' and just say very loudly, "mate, just let the donkey get some sleep, it's due back at the petting zoo". Sadly, her key card does not work on their floor and she wasn't so sure of my wonderful idea Me and her with our gut issues...Both of us have had it suddenly happen not long after taking our meds, so wasting them as they go down the plug hole or toilet.. Will watch the review soon..
Get well soon, Paul (and Selena). Hope Cindy stays free of the vomiting and you guys are back on your feet in a day or so. As for the intrusive bonking marathons above, try playing Baz's game reviews on full blast... it should send them to sleep (works with everyone else).
I have a new daughter, Selena? I wonder if the wife knows?? I have stopped vom'ing, purely because here's nothing left to bring up. Apparently it's another fun little thing doing the rounds at the moment..Oh joy, lucky us. Serena in Uni today, so I hope she's had a break in the vom'ing as well. Last thing anyone needs is a person doing an impersonation of Mr Creosote, complete with real vom (but hopefully NOT the exploding chest)
